What was the one experience that completely changed your life? What happened? How did it change your life?
THOSE TWO WORDS
Never thought saying “I do” could completely change your life! If I knew how much power was in those words, I would have been more careful about speaking them. I can’t say there was not some bliss, as people imagine. The honeymoon, looking at life with rose-colored eye glasses really was nice.. for a while. Oh, would all of life stay in the moment of perfection, your mate’s perfection, and everyone and everything around the two of you. Life was sweet, so sweet even the mistakes and blunders of living seemed to smooth out so fast. You were back on “right street” in no time.
However, life returned to normal pace and you were suddenly coming to a screeching halt and switching lanes. Trying to catch up to normalcy which did not happen. I found myself planning, budgeting, watching and paying for bills that seemed to double. Yes, the wedding expenses I knew were on the list, but never thought more would be added to that l-o-n-g list. My immediate reaction was to handle it. Handle it “I did”, but then suddenly, without warning I was handling an empty bank account. The same bank account from which all the bills had to be paid. I learned there was a “leak” in my system. Going to the bank revealed the money was missing. I went into “panic mode”. Rushing home, there was no one else I could put this upon except my mate. I felt like a lawyer, a juror, and a Judge, asking so many interrogating questions. “What happened, where is the money?”
My mate became a prime suspect and he was already guilty. Long story short, one case resolved, money restored, and I went back to my accounting position. It could have been the other way around. Meaning, verdict reached, money restored, and I was on my way home to sign annulment papers. There seemed to be some repentance. Therefore, I was persuaded to give it a re-try since we were newly married. After all having a responsibility to manage the household gave me some status in the world. I had quit my job and moved away from my family to be with the “love of my life”. So I was resigned that “I would do” my best, and “do I did”. I did say “I Do” which is a vow to God that you keep.
I did the shopping, washing, making sure he paid the rent, the gas/electric, the car note, and the cooking when he allowed it. After one year and now a mother,”I did” the bathing, the arrangements for child care, the career management (his and mine), the budgeting, and the accounting. This was on my “I Do” list, but he must have thrown his away. I can say he was a perfect baby-birthing coach, and he did get up at night to comfort new baby, but “I did” the majority of new baby care. Nursing from the breast was easy until I returned back to work. However, he dropped out of work without me knowing.
A trip to his office revealed everything I needed to see. I thought I had fixed the “leak” in the budget, but discovered evidence that it was hemorrhaging profusely. No bills were being paid! I was devastated. The problem we had before was much worse. My head was spirally just like the staircase that put me in the room of unpaid bills. What should “I do” since I did say “I do”? Long story short, the problems of thinking “I had to do” it all surmounted and they became too overwhelming. I just could not “do it” anymore. It was time to say “I don’t”.
Wow, never thought two little words could take you to places you have never been spiritually, economically, socially, etc. However, depending on how you use them, how you add a n’t to them, “I do” can turn out to be a life saver in more ways than one. Now, “I do” for me and those who know how to appreciate it. “I don’t” is still waiting for those who won’t.
“Do not give what is holy to the dogs, nor cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you in pieces.” (Matthew 7:6 NKJV)